Chris Pinto recently “apologized” for his libel.
The problem: It was not a genuine apology. It was disappointing. In fact, Pinto violated the most basic principles of giving an apology.
I will describe five ways on how not to apologize.
1. Do not apologize by shifting blame. This is so common. And so wrong. For example, “I am sorry if I hurt you.” This is basically what Pinto does by saying that he is sorry that people took his comments as “inflammatory impact.”
Takeaway: Confess that you did something wrong.
2. Do not apologize vaguely. For example, “I made some statements.” Pinto assumed his readers knows what he is apologizing for. But Pinto said he is apologizing to myself and James White. But he never gives specifics.
Takeaway: List the specific wrongdoing, and even—this is the real test for a sincere apology—explain why it was wrong for you to have said or did something.
3. Do not use the typical tone of your voice—the apology does not sound genuine. In fact, Pinto’s tone sounded forced, as if he did not want to “apologize.”
Takeaway: Sound contrite. Actually sound like you are sorry.
4. Do not delay your apology, especially after your conversation with someone is finished. Pinto leaves his “apology” for after his radio show was finished. Further, he never even notes it in his program summary.
Takeaway: Be upfront. Get it cleared up soon, if you are really sorry for something.
5. Do not forget to ask for forgiveness, which shows you are not deeply contrite. Pinto failed to ask for forgiveness.
Takeaway: The ultimate goal is reconciliation, which is conditioned on contriteness.
I do hope Pinto will take these principles into consideration. I am willing to forgive someone for wrongdoing, but a contrite heart, as the Bible teaches, is a condition for forgiveness. So we need to pray for Pinto’s repentance that he sees his sinful actions.
